Blind, Bound, Bleeding.
Red hot pain
removed my eyes;
I am Blind.
Burning coarse ropes
bind my wrists behind,
bind my ankles together,
hold my flesh unkindly;
I am Bound.
Seeping warmth, seeping life,
ebbing down my arms,
ebbing down my legs,
seeping through the gaps
in my bruised and broken flesh,
pooling my life beneath me.
I am Bleeding.
Blind,
Bound,
Bleeding.
Alone in the silence,
mute in the darkness,
held in the death
that began my life;
I am Blind.
Torn from the truth,
concealed from the lies,
hidden within their hearts,
I am Bound.
Whispering the silence,
Bound in the secrets,
Weeping for mercy;
I am Bleeding.
Blind,
Bound,
Bleeding,
Within you,
Needing you,
but Ignored.
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2 comments:
Very nicely written. Excellent use of alliteration and evocative language. If I may, I have three comments/suggestions.
1. Why not use the word "pooling" instead of "puddling"? Puddle seems a little farce, out of place.
2. Bound and bleeding had two stanzas each, but blind only had one. Seems to be a lack of resolution in the poem.
3. In the second last stanza, why a comma instead of a full stop?
I agree with the 'puddling' to pooling, but...I think you should reread my post, blind has two stanzas, albeit the first is only three lines long.
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