The most pointless confusing counterintuitive game I have ever had the misfortune to play. Fair enough that I am not the most competent of gaming individuals, it's not like I go out and buy and clock a new game every week but... godamn.
I got ...just passed the title screen. That is how 'good' this game is. My god.
Okay, you start with the opening cutscene, sure whatever, except oh no, you have to BLINK. Blink your way through a cutscene. If you don't blink, everything goes white and you can't see. Which defeats the whole purpose of the cutscene thing. If you can't watch it then... well.
Some talking about something and someone gets hit, I don't know, I wasn't really paying attention because I kept on having to BLINK. But, eventually you get to walk and blink at the same time. Whoooo, multitasking! Sadly, I also lacked the intuitive manner in which I could turn and walk and blink. Just walk sideways and grind your face against the wall until getting hit by the guard to swing you around, and oh hey, have to climb some stairs, and blink.
He ends up dying, and I spent, I swear to god, fifteen minutes blinking and trying to figure out where I was supposed to go. Yay, a mirror! Punch the mirror and we can now be a camera. Awesome.
...this is the general theme of the sodding game. You climb a rope, okay, my version is for the Playstation 2, so it was X to jump and grab the rope, but square to jump while holding -onto- the rope because if you x jumped you let go of the rope, fell to your doom and died and had to go through the sodding thing all over again. Oiye.
I managed to get through putting out some fire, bashing in a door, and getting over a hole in the floor. Which, lo and behold, brought me to the TITLE SCREEN. I now know what game I am playing.
Jumping onto a rope and a ledge and dying umpteen million times, and I gave up. Literally. And it took me an HOUR to get there. ...I died a lot.
Now, if you want to -play- this game, I highly recommend you do so with an audience of other people who have learnt the joy of Alone In The Dark. Why? Because that makes it a fun game. It is just a game of fail, really. The audience spends more time reminiscing about how -they- failed attempting to do anything in the process.
This game seems to be a mash up of all horror genres with the least amount of sense possible. You start confused, and it just doesn't get any better. You start out with blinking and whitescreen, people getting eaten by shadows, fire, then progress to cracks in the floor that eat you and drag you around, and zombies. Where the HELL did the zombies come from? I mean -really-. The hungry floor is -somewhat- plausible, the shadows that ate people had to come from -something- right? But -zombies-. What the hell?! ...And everything is strangely immune to fire.
It is the best game to make fun of, because it is so counter-intuitive to play. That is the sole saving feature of the game. You can watch someone -else- play it and fail. And laugh.
Sunday, 10 April 2011
Saturday, 29 August 2009
Work
Okay, sound this out with me. It's been three months, and I have been working every week on saturday night, 6-midnight. Work did -not- have any extra shifts for me, period. not even ONE, for that entire three months unless they called me in because someone called in sick.
I get asked to work in another store, I agree instantly, and make noises about offering them more of my free time as they need it. I work at this other store, actually -enjoy- working at said other store and all of a sudden they require me to work in that store three days in a row? Hmm. I smell something a little bit sus.
So, I check the roster, and lo and behold, I finally have an extra shift! methink mazing! However, they neglected to inform me that there -might- have been changes to my usual routine, and so, I neglected to inform myself of this.
Am I over reacting? is the fact that I -liked- the time spent working in another store -not- synonymous with extra shifts in the store that I was first employed in, a store that miraculously have the extra hours to give me?
Oh, there's another -delightful- part of working there. See, Assistent Manager A is a biatch, and a mean manager. So to complain about Assistent manager A, you have to go to Store Manager B. Slight problem, Store Manager B and Assistent Manager A are good friends... so guess who's word is going to get more weight? Okay, so now we have a problem with Store Manager B, so we go up another rank on the tier to Area Manager C. You with me so far? But alas! Store Manager B and Area Manager C live IN THE SAME HOUSE. Guess who's bedbuddies hmm? And to go above Area Manager C you have to ask.... State Manager? or something? about it, but alas, there is this slight problem of NOT KNOWING WHO THE FUCK THAT IS.
A + B + C = you are screwed.
I get asked to work in another store, I agree instantly, and make noises about offering them more of my free time as they need it. I work at this other store, actually -enjoy- working at said other store and all of a sudden they require me to work in that store three days in a row? Hmm. I smell something a little bit sus.
So, I check the roster, and lo and behold, I finally have an extra shift! methink mazing! However, they neglected to inform me that there -might- have been changes to my usual routine, and so, I neglected to inform myself of this.
Am I over reacting? is the fact that I -liked- the time spent working in another store -not- synonymous with extra shifts in the store that I was first employed in, a store that miraculously have the extra hours to give me?
Oh, there's another -delightful- part of working there. See, Assistent Manager A is a biatch, and a mean manager. So to complain about Assistent manager A, you have to go to Store Manager B. Slight problem, Store Manager B and Assistent Manager A are good friends... so guess who's word is going to get more weight? Okay, so now we have a problem with Store Manager B, so we go up another rank on the tier to Area Manager C. You with me so far? But alas! Store Manager B and Area Manager C live IN THE SAME HOUSE. Guess who's bedbuddies hmm? And to go above Area Manager C you have to ask.... State Manager? or something? about it, but alas, there is this slight problem of NOT KNOWING WHO THE FUCK THAT IS.
A + B + C = you are screwed.
Monday, 10 August 2009
And now, for your regularly schedualed chaotically supplied diversion of the amusing factor
<3 Total eclipse of the heart. Literally.
Meatloaf! Anything for love.
And that is your reguarly schedualed but chaotically supplied diversion of the amusing factor. Have a nice day ^^
~ShaedowDancer~
Wednesday, 24 June 2009
Quote of the Month -- and poem
Rylia says, "Once upon a midnight dreary, while I pr0n surfed, weak and weary,
over many a strange and spurious site of 'hot xxx galore'.
While I clicked my fav'rite bookmark, suddenly there came a warning,
and my heart was filled with mourning, mourning for my dear amour,
"'Tis not possible!", I muttered,"Give me back my free hardcore!"
Rylia says, "Quoth the server, 404."
That made me hurt myself laughing. Credit goes to Rylia, and Dianna, and the adult fun-place of textual imaginings known as Shangri-La. But enough about the credit. Now, for a new poem! I haven't been writing as much as I did two years ago, but well, there you have it.
Wish, Wish, Wish.
Wish for a story,
Pray it is true.
Hope they are happy
and love pulled through.
Wish for a memory
of loves first kiss,
hope that it curdled
with a flick of the wrist.
Wish for a dream;
The sky turns red.
Fire on the horizon
mourned by the dead.
Wish for the hope
Where has love gone?
Down the drains of misery,
preyed on by the unbourne.
Hate is the cure,
Pray for the end.
Misery take you,
my long forgotten friend.
Finis.
Just a simple, short thing really. A ten minute bus trip worth of time. :)
~ShaedowDancer~
over many a strange and spurious site of 'hot xxx galore'.
While I clicked my fav'rite bookmark, suddenly there came a warning,
and my heart was filled with mourning, mourning for my dear amour,
"'Tis not possible!", I muttered,"Give me back my free hardcore!"
Rylia says, "Quoth the server, 404."
That made me hurt myself laughing. Credit goes to Rylia, and Dianna, and the adult fun-place of textual imaginings known as Shangri-La. But enough about the credit. Now, for a new poem! I haven't been writing as much as I did two years ago, but well, there you have it.
Wish, Wish, Wish.
Wish for a story,
Pray it is true.
Hope they are happy
and love pulled through.
Wish for a memory
of loves first kiss,
hope that it curdled
with a flick of the wrist.
Wish for a dream;
The sky turns red.
Fire on the horizon
mourned by the dead.
Wish for the hope
Where has love gone?
Down the drains of misery,
preyed on by the unbourne.
Hate is the cure,
Pray for the end.
Misery take you,
my long forgotten friend.
Finis.
Just a simple, short thing really. A ten minute bus trip worth of time. :)
~ShaedowDancer~
Saturday, 13 June 2009
Complaints!
I seem to be in a complaining mood today, so I shall complain!
First up: LISTEN, think, pause, reply.
Please, for the love of god, when you are TALKING to someone, LISTEN to what they are saying before you spout out some completely off-tangential question. For example, asking someone if they have anything planned for the evening? 'no', do NOT then ask them what they are DOING in that VERY SAME EVENING. The answer will be 'no'. I mean, dude, seriously, you just ASKED THAT.
Dickhead.
'what are you doing now?' 'watching tv' 'so what are you drawing then?' .........
.... -_-
'I just said that I am watching tv' 'oh sorry. What are you watching?' 'tv'.
Hint: If you are getting the equivalent of a monosyllabic reply that tells you precisely what you asked and not one whit more, odds are THEY DON'T WANT TO TALK TO YOU. And please, with sugar on top, do NOT keep asking questions because the conversation (such as it was) not only died, but is buried and slimy with three months worth of rot! Asking questions of 'so... sup' does NOT constitute having 'anything in common', and that, dear idiots, is REQUIRED for a conversation to even OCCUR.
For petes sake.
Oh, and talking about sex doesn't count. 'yeah, so, I just finished wanking' no. Just... no. Please. DON'T GO THERE. If you are confused, go back to the hint, and read it over. Again. And again. And again. Until you get the hint!
Second complaint: COMMUNICATION.
If you send me an email, and I reply to it. You reply again, and without waiting for me to send one BACK to you, you call me? DONT. For petes sake, what was wrong with the medium being used? It was a way of talking that didn't invade, like a phone call does. I use my phone, pretty much, for emergencies only. What if my mother got into a car accident, had both her legs and her back broken and was unconsious, and the doctors needed the next of kin to come down and give a medical history because she was sort of OUT OF IT, but they couldn't get through because I was stuck talking to some dipstick I didn't like, giving monosyllabic answers until he took the hint and left? For pete's sake people. Pick a medium of communication and STICK WITH IT.
Another thing, if you communicate with someone via a somewhat less than reliable source ie. by writing a comment on my blog to me (I read all of them by the way, as I have to verify and allow them to be posted) do be a dear and CHECK BACK ON IT. Odds are if it is TO me specifically, rather than just a thingy comment, then I WILL reply to it, on my blog. Right below your comment. Asking when something happens is all very well and good, but it doesn't help YOU much if you never look back to see what my answer was!
Gyah!
Third thing: Teasing.
Odds are, if you are reading this then you know me. You know that I have issues with insomnia, and even if you -don't- know of this blog, then you will know of the insomnia anyways! So, with this reminder, do not, please, do NOT call me lazy because I got up at 9.30 in the fricking morning. Odds are I'll have gotten to sleep at FOUR. Who's the lazy one now? You going to bed at 10.30pm and getting up at six. Oohhh... you had to get up at six after a whole EIGHT HOURS SLEEP. I have just gotten FIVE and you call ME lazy?
Oh for pete's sake.
Another thing. I have an eating problem. In the sense that I don't. I eat perhaps ONCE a day. Maybe. And that relies heavily on how much I've drunk (juice, or especially milk) in that day as to whether or not I get hungry. If I am not hungry, I do not eat. End of story. "oh you need to eat more" dickhead. LOOK AT ME. I am NOT the thinnest twig in the forest, OBVIOUSLY I eat TOO MUCH. So do NOT for the love of god, tease me about it, or call me up on it. Ever.
Mother dearest snarling at me every time I opened the fridge from when I was ...god I don't know, 13? with a two year break while she and my father separated, until I had to move in with her to finish schooling. So, from three years ago, CONSTANTLY growled at for going to the fridge to get something to eat puts a damper on your appatite. Not having time in the morning to make yourself breakfast, nor lunch while -at- school reduces on your -need- to eat. So you want to call me up on not eating? Go jump off a bridge. Dickhead.
'Teasing' does not mean being crude, making blunt sexual references for metaphores that are perfectly acceptable as the G-8 rating! Seriously people, there is no need to be crass!
Fourth: Friendly vs Social vs Easy.
I am a FRIENDLY person. Not social. And most certainly NOT easy.
You tell someone that you are friendly, and they automatically assume that you will spend every waking minute of every hour of every day with them, or if not with them, with other people out in crowds doing things. This is not always the case! You do such, if you are a -social- person. I am not. I dislike people, intensely, and I -loathe- crowds.
I am friendly. Which is to say I'll talk to almost anyone, get a smile, or a laugh, or even a strange look before they start murmuring about having to stand elsewhere, but I also like my 'alone time'. I would rather curl up somewhere with a book, or a sketch pad and pencil, than go out and -have- to talk to people that I don't like.
You try to explain this to people, and they assume that 'alone time' means something else entirely, and that they can quite easily invade your alone time with their alone time for some 'together' alone time. Thus 'friendly' equates to 'easy' or 'social'.
It is NOT the case. I'm probably complaining to no one, of no one in particular, but I just have to get this out there.
Friendly =\= an easy lay
Friendly =\= a social butterfly
Friendly =\= desperate for attention
Friendly =\= malleable to molding
Friendly =\= anything other than just being FRIENDLY.
Friendly = being polite, listening, smiling, giving someone your attention until such a time as other things occur. This does NOT mean that you need complete and utter devotion from another, this does NOT mean that you need to -give- said complete and utter devotion to someone else.
And no, being friendly but not social is NOT a deficiency! It does -not- need to be 'fixed'. If you cannot wrap your head around this, I repeat myself from before, GO JUMP OFF A BRIDGE.
Fifth, Staring:
Okay, I know eyes wander, it's what they DO. But please, please, PLEASE, for the love of god, do not STARE. Sure, look, but don't make it OBVIOUS. For petes sake, have a sense of decorum and SUBTLETY. Godamn, you'd think that sort of thing would be, you know, COMMON SENSE.
Sixth, Art 'critiques':
If I ask for your opinion on something that I've drawn, PLEASE give me an honest one. If you hate it, say so, but please be able to tell me WHY as well, so that I can improve. More than 'oh I don't like it because that nose is too big' or 'I don't like the way you drew that there'. If you don't like the subject matter, SAY SO, if you don't like the colours used, SAY SO, if you don't like the proportions, SAY SO. Point it out to me, so that I can get better. Give and take people, I want to get better, but to my eye, my drawing isn't getting any better, but according to others I am growing by leaps and bounds. To me, it still sucks, so I'm not that good a judge of my own work. That's why I ask!
But please, PLEASE, if I ask for your opinion, and you say "I don't have one until you draw such and such for me" I am liable to scream. I DON'T want to draw what YOU want me to draw. You want a picture of pinocchio stuck in whatisface's blowhole? DRAW IT YOURSELF. Or pay me to, which will give me your opinion on my art regardless. I mean dude, if you're willing to pay for my shit, you must like it, so why couldn't you just SAY SO.
Dickhead.
I think that covers everything that is snapping at me lately, and making me snarl. I sure as hell hope so.
~ShaedowDancer~
First up: LISTEN, think, pause, reply.
Please, for the love of god, when you are TALKING to someone, LISTEN to what they are saying before you spout out some completely off-tangential question. For example, asking someone if they have anything planned for the evening? 'no', do NOT then ask them what they are DOING in that VERY SAME EVENING. The answer will be 'no'. I mean, dude, seriously, you just ASKED THAT.
Dickhead.
'what are you doing now?' 'watching tv' 'so what are you drawing then?' .........
.... -_-
'I just said that I am watching tv' 'oh sorry. What are you watching?' 'tv'.
Hint: If you are getting the equivalent of a monosyllabic reply that tells you precisely what you asked and not one whit more, odds are THEY DON'T WANT TO TALK TO YOU. And please, with sugar on top, do NOT keep asking questions because the conversation (such as it was) not only died, but is buried and slimy with three months worth of rot! Asking questions of 'so... sup' does NOT constitute having 'anything in common', and that, dear idiots, is REQUIRED for a conversation to even OCCUR.
For petes sake.
Oh, and talking about sex doesn't count. 'yeah, so, I just finished wanking' no. Just... no. Please. DON'T GO THERE. If you are confused, go back to the hint, and read it over. Again. And again. And again. Until you get the hint!
Second complaint: COMMUNICATION.
If you send me an email, and I reply to it. You reply again, and without waiting for me to send one BACK to you, you call me? DONT. For petes sake, what was wrong with the medium being used? It was a way of talking that didn't invade, like a phone call does. I use my phone, pretty much, for emergencies only. What if my mother got into a car accident, had both her legs and her back broken and was unconsious, and the doctors needed the next of kin to come down and give a medical history because she was sort of OUT OF IT, but they couldn't get through because I was stuck talking to some dipstick I didn't like, giving monosyllabic answers until he took the hint and left? For pete's sake people. Pick a medium of communication and STICK WITH IT.
Another thing, if you communicate with someone via a somewhat less than reliable source ie. by writing a comment on my blog to me (I read all of them by the way, as I have to verify and allow them to be posted) do be a dear and CHECK BACK ON IT. Odds are if it is TO me specifically, rather than just a thingy comment, then I WILL reply to it, on my blog. Right below your comment. Asking when something happens is all very well and good, but it doesn't help YOU much if you never look back to see what my answer was!
Gyah!
Third thing: Teasing.
Odds are, if you are reading this then you know me. You know that I have issues with insomnia, and even if you -don't- know of this blog, then you will know of the insomnia anyways! So, with this reminder, do not, please, do NOT call me lazy because I got up at 9.30 in the fricking morning. Odds are I'll have gotten to sleep at FOUR. Who's the lazy one now? You going to bed at 10.30pm and getting up at six. Oohhh... you had to get up at six after a whole EIGHT HOURS SLEEP. I have just gotten FIVE and you call ME lazy?
Oh for pete's sake.
Another thing. I have an eating problem. In the sense that I don't. I eat perhaps ONCE a day. Maybe. And that relies heavily on how much I've drunk (juice, or especially milk) in that day as to whether or not I get hungry. If I am not hungry, I do not eat. End of story. "oh you need to eat more" dickhead. LOOK AT ME. I am NOT the thinnest twig in the forest, OBVIOUSLY I eat TOO MUCH. So do NOT for the love of god, tease me about it, or call me up on it. Ever.
Mother dearest snarling at me every time I opened the fridge from when I was ...god I don't know, 13? with a two year break while she and my father separated, until I had to move in with her to finish schooling. So, from three years ago, CONSTANTLY growled at for going to the fridge to get something to eat puts a damper on your appatite. Not having time in the morning to make yourself breakfast, nor lunch while -at- school reduces on your -need- to eat. So you want to call me up on not eating? Go jump off a bridge. Dickhead.
'Teasing' does not mean being crude, making blunt sexual references for metaphores that are perfectly acceptable as the G-8 rating! Seriously people, there is no need to be crass!
Fourth: Friendly vs Social vs Easy.
I am a FRIENDLY person. Not social. And most certainly NOT easy.
You tell someone that you are friendly, and they automatically assume that you will spend every waking minute of every hour of every day with them, or if not with them, with other people out in crowds doing things. This is not always the case! You do such, if you are a -social- person. I am not. I dislike people, intensely, and I -loathe- crowds.
I am friendly. Which is to say I'll talk to almost anyone, get a smile, or a laugh, or even a strange look before they start murmuring about having to stand elsewhere, but I also like my 'alone time'. I would rather curl up somewhere with a book, or a sketch pad and pencil, than go out and -have- to talk to people that I don't like.
You try to explain this to people, and they assume that 'alone time' means something else entirely, and that they can quite easily invade your alone time with their alone time for some 'together' alone time. Thus 'friendly' equates to 'easy' or 'social'.
It is NOT the case. I'm probably complaining to no one, of no one in particular, but I just have to get this out there.
Friendly =\= an easy lay
Friendly =\= a social butterfly
Friendly =\= desperate for attention
Friendly =\= malleable to molding
Friendly =\= anything other than just being FRIENDLY.
Friendly = being polite, listening, smiling, giving someone your attention until such a time as other things occur. This does NOT mean that you need complete and utter devotion from another, this does NOT mean that you need to -give- said complete and utter devotion to someone else.
And no, being friendly but not social is NOT a deficiency! It does -not- need to be 'fixed'. If you cannot wrap your head around this, I repeat myself from before, GO JUMP OFF A BRIDGE.
Fifth, Staring:
Okay, I know eyes wander, it's what they DO. But please, please, PLEASE, for the love of god, do not STARE. Sure, look, but don't make it OBVIOUS. For petes sake, have a sense of decorum and SUBTLETY. Godamn, you'd think that sort of thing would be, you know, COMMON SENSE.
Sixth, Art 'critiques':
If I ask for your opinion on something that I've drawn, PLEASE give me an honest one. If you hate it, say so, but please be able to tell me WHY as well, so that I can improve. More than 'oh I don't like it because that nose is too big' or 'I don't like the way you drew that there'. If you don't like the subject matter, SAY SO, if you don't like the colours used, SAY SO, if you don't like the proportions, SAY SO. Point it out to me, so that I can get better. Give and take people, I want to get better, but to my eye, my drawing isn't getting any better, but according to others I am growing by leaps and bounds. To me, it still sucks, so I'm not that good a judge of my own work. That's why I ask!
But please, PLEASE, if I ask for your opinion, and you say "I don't have one until you draw such and such for me" I am liable to scream. I DON'T want to draw what YOU want me to draw. You want a picture of pinocchio stuck in whatisface's blowhole? DRAW IT YOURSELF. Or pay me to, which will give me your opinion on my art regardless. I mean dude, if you're willing to pay for my shit, you must like it, so why couldn't you just SAY SO.
Dickhead.
I think that covers everything that is snapping at me lately, and making me snarl. I sure as hell hope so.
~ShaedowDancer~
Wednesday, 10 June 2009
Melancholy and loneliness
You know what sucks? When you are lonely for a specific person, or type of person, or something, but the only people around you that offer you company are needy, clinging, and you have to watch every other word with them?
What sucks even worse is when you find that people you think you would get along really well with, and would mesh well with, they up and vanish without a word as to why. Which makes you think back -- hey, this has happened before -- and since. So you miss the folk that leave, while giving a reason, but those that vanish without a word make you cry and think -- Did I do something wrong? What happened? Did something bad happened? Or did they just get bored and leave? -- and then the clingy people ask why you are sad, so you say, and then they get offended and sulky themselves because you don't care enough about -them- to cry over them, and neither can they help to brighten your mood.
*sighs*
Before this, I was feeling like an object, just ... something to be stared at. Which was what was happening. Alot. And -obviously-. Ick.
Now I feel unwanted. But due to objecthood, I want to feel cherished, wanted as a -person- not as a thing. *sighs*
And I've got my first exam tomorrow, another two next week. Great time for emotional/mental crisis! I have the best timing ever. -_- Not.
~ShaedowDancer~
What sucks even worse is when you find that people you think you would get along really well with, and would mesh well with, they up and vanish without a word as to why. Which makes you think back -- hey, this has happened before -- and since. So you miss the folk that leave, while giving a reason, but those that vanish without a word make you cry and think -- Did I do something wrong? What happened? Did something bad happened? Or did they just get bored and leave? -- and then the clingy people ask why you are sad, so you say, and then they get offended and sulky themselves because you don't care enough about -them- to cry over them, and neither can they help to brighten your mood.
*sighs*
Before this, I was feeling like an object, just ... something to be stared at. Which was what was happening. Alot. And -obviously-. Ick.
Now I feel unwanted. But due to objecthood, I want to feel cherished, wanted as a -person- not as a thing. *sighs*
And I've got my first exam tomorrow, another two next week. Great time for emotional/mental crisis! I have the best timing ever. -_- Not.
~ShaedowDancer~
Tuesday, 26 May 2009
September, september
Oh for it to be september!
GodDAMN I need a holiday. Why is it, I wonder, that EVERYONE wants a bit of your time when you seriously do not HAVE any to give?!
Gyah! And then they complain that you are 'too busy'. -_- Just because I use up all the days in my week with stuff I -have- to do, and that the days when I'm not either working or at uni happen to be in the middle of the week is not -my- fault.
You can do more in the middle of the week than on the weekend anyways. Nothing is open on the weekend. Believe me, I know. That's why I work it.
In other news, I have the aeroplane ticket BACK from the states. Yay! Now I'm not getting deported ^_~
GodDAMN I need a holiday. Why is it, I wonder, that EVERYONE wants a bit of your time when you seriously do not HAVE any to give?!
Gyah! And then they complain that you are 'too busy'. -_- Just because I use up all the days in my week with stuff I -have- to do, and that the days when I'm not either working or at uni happen to be in the middle of the week is not -my- fault.
You can do more in the middle of the week than on the weekend anyways. Nothing is open on the weekend. Believe me, I know. That's why I work it.
In other news, I have the aeroplane ticket BACK from the states. Yay! Now I'm not getting deported ^_~
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